At 28, I was the picture of health — a busy millennial woman balancing motherhood, marriage, fitness, and a career I enjoyed. I lived an active lifestyle, made healthy choices, and genuinely believed I had plenty of time before I’d need to think about anything as serious as estate planning.
That belief disappeared the night I woke up struggling to breathe, coughing up blood, and fighting dizziness as my husband rushed me to the ER. A scan revealed a large tumor completely blocking my airway. Within a day, I received a cancer diagnosis that changed everything.
Shock, fear, and uncertainty flooded my world. And in the middle of that whirlwind came a realization that felt just as heavy:
I had no will. No plan. No legal protections in place for my husband or my child.
Like many women, I assumed I’d “get to it eventually.” But suddenly, eventually wasn’t guaranteed.
The Wake-Up Call: Facing Mortality in My 20s
I never deliberately chose to put off estate planning. It just never felt urgent. It lived permanently on my mental to-do list — something I’d handle once life felt less busy, once I hit a new milestone, or once I had “more to my name.”
But life doesn’t wait for the perfect moment.
When my treatment plan included major surgery, I knew I had to face the reality I had avoided. Creating a will in the middle of a health crisis was emotional and overwhelming—something I would never want another woman to experience.
What Estate Planning Really Involves
Estate planning is often misunderstood as something only older or wealthier people need. But if you have:
- A child
- A partner
- A pet
- A home or apartment
- A bank account
- Online accounts or digital assets
…then you already have an estate. And someone in your life is counting on you, financially or emotionally, even if you don’t realize it.
Here’s what surprised me most as I went through the process:
1. Understanding My Financial Life Was Empowering
I thought I had a clear picture of our finances, but working with an advisor showed me just how many accounts, policies, and assets actually needed attention. Seeing everything laid out made the process feel more manageable and gave me a clearer sense of responsibility and ownership.
2. Digital Assets Are Easy to Overlook
From photos and subscriptions to social media, online accounts, and cloud storage, most of us carry a huge part of our lives digitally. I hadn’t considered how important it would be for my family to access or manage these things — until I had to plan for it.
3. End-of-Life Care Is a Critical Part of the Process
Setting up documents that outline your medical wishes is a deeply personal and essential step. It ensures that if you’re ever unable to make decisions yourself, the people you trust can honor your preferences without being left to guess during an emotional time.
This is especially important for women, who often carry the mental load in their families. Making these decisions ahead of time removes unnecessary stress from your loved ones.
4. Pets Need Protection Too
Many pets end up in shelters because their owners didn’t have a plan in place. If you’re a pet mom, including care instructions and a designated guardian ensures they’re loved and safe no matter what.
The Unexpected Relief I Found
Thankfully, my surgery was successful. The tumor hadn’t spread, and I am now cancer-free and healing well. While my will ended up being precautionary, the peace of mind it gave me was immediate and powerful.
I felt clarity.
I felt prepared.
I felt grounded, even in uncertainty.
That sense of security is something I want every woman to experience — not just during a crisis, but long before one ever appears.
How to Start Your Estate Plan: A Practical Guide for Women
If you’re reading this and wondering where to begin, you’re not alone. Estate planning sounds intimidating, but the first steps are simple — and incredibly empowering. Think of it as organizing your life, protecting your family, and making intentional choices about your legacy.
Here’s how you can get started:
1. Take Inventory of What You Own
Begin by writing down a clear list of your assets. This can include:
- Bank accounts
- Retirement or investment accounts
- Your home or rental property
- Vehicles
- Personal valuables
- Digital assets (photos, social accounts, subscriptions, online business accounts)
This list becomes the foundation of your estate plan.
2. Decide Who Should Receive What
Think about the people, pets, or causes that matter most to you. Estate planning isn’t just about dividing belongings — it’s about making sure the things you’ve built go to the people who rely on you or the passions you care about.
3. Choose Guardians for Children or Pets
If you’re a mother or a pet parent, this is one of the most important decisions you can make. Selecting a guardian ensures your child or animal will be loved and cared for exactly the way you intend.
4. Establish Your Medical and Financial Decision-Makers
Consider who you would trust to:
- Make medical decisions
- Manage finances
- Access accounts or pay bills
- Communicate with doctors
Putting this in writing ensures your wishes are honored if something unexpected happens.
5. Work With an Advisor or Attorney
You don’t have to do this alone. Financial advisors and estate planning attorneys can walk you through the process, answer questions, and ensure everything is legally sound. Many offer virtual appointments and online document completion to make the process accessible and stress-free.
6. Use Technology to Your Advantage
Today, many women start their estate plans online. Digital platforms can help you:
- Create a basic will
- Store documents securely
- Organize passwords and digital accounts
- Share access with trusted people
This can be a simple first step before meeting with a professional.
7. Treat It as a Living Document
Your estate plan should evolve as your life does. Review and update it when you experience major changes such as:
- Marriage or divorce
- Buying a property
- Having or adopting a child
- Starting a business
- Career or income changes
- Significant financial growth
An estate plan isn’t set in stone — it grows with you.
8. Give Yourself Credit for Taking the First Step
Starting your estate plan is an act of strength and love. It means you’re thinking ahead, prioritizing the people who rely on you, and taking control of your financial life.
You don’t have to finish it all in one day. Begin with one small step, and let that momentum carry you forward.
Final Thoughts
I never imagined I’d face such a serious medical emergency in my 20s, nor that it would force me to create an estate plan under pressure. But the experience taught me something profound:
Women deserve peace of mind — and we shouldn’t wait for a crisis to claim it.
Your legacy, your loved ones, and your future are worth protecting.
Start today, before life gives you a reason to wish you had.
Disclaimer:
This article is for general informational purposes only and is not intended to provide specific financial, legal, or investment advice. Opinions are subject to change. For guidance tailored to your situation, consult a financial advisor or estate planning attorney.
